Why men are happy people.

Tracey Tilley

Well Known and Active Forum User
VOC Member
Men Are Just Happier People--

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can never be pregnant.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks and engines.

A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

Your underwear is £9.50 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original colour.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one colour for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 24 relatives on 24th December in 24 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
 

John Cone

Well Known and Active Forum User
VOC Member
I liked this one I recieved yesterday.
GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like
Africa - half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like
Europe - well-developed and open to trade, especially for something of real value.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like
Spain - very hot, relaxed, and convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like
Greece & gently aging, but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like
Great Britain, with a glorious and all-conquering past..

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like
Israel - has been through war, doesn't make the same mistakes twice, and takes care of business.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like
Canada - cool, self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.

After 70, she becomes
Tibet - wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages.... an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge.
·

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN


Between 1 and 80, a man is like
Iran - ruled by a couple of nuts.

THE END.


 
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