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Forums: Public Access
Everything Else (Not Vincent Related)
Some of Tommy Cooper's jokes
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<blockquote data-quote="Tracey Tilley" data-source="post: 20486" data-attributes="member: 119"><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">"Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home."</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">"That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome".</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">"Is it common?"</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">"It's not unusual".</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said, "You've been promoted". And I swerved.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again".</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said, "You're managing director".</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said, "What happened to you?"</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">And I said, "I careered off the road".</span></span></span><span style="color: darkgreen"></span></p><p><span style="color: darkgreen"></span> <span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.</span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, 'That's Aboriginal.'</span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="color: darkgreen"><span style="font-size: 12px">I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can't remember his name, its P something T something R.</span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tracey Tilley, post: 20486, member: 119"] [FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3]"Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home." "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome". "Is it common?" "It's not unusual". [/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3]So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said, "You've been promoted". And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again". And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said, "You're managing director". And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said, "What happened to you?" And I said, "I careered off the road".[/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][COLOR=darkgreen] [/COLOR] [FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3] [/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3]I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.[/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3] [/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3]I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, 'That's Aboriginal.'[/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3] [/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Book Antiqua][COLOR=darkgreen][SIZE=3]I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can't remember his name, its P something T something R.[/SIZE][/COLOR][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Everything Else (Not Vincent Related)
Some of Tommy Cooper's jokes
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