Some of Tommy Cooper's jokes

Tracey Tilley

Tracey Tilley

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"Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home."
"That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome".
"Is it common?"
"It's not unusual".

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said, "You've been promoted". And I swerved.
And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again".
And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said, "You're managing director".
And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said, "What happened to you?"
And I said, "I careered off the road".
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, 'That's Aboriginal.'

I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can't remember his name, its P something T something R.
 
nkt267

nkt267

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Is there minimum number of those you have to know to live in Caerphilly?
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If you admit to knowing any of those they throw you out of Caerphilly:D. Glass bottle,bottle glass.John
 
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mr.hutch

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Please enlighten me re. 'Glass bottle, bottle glass.'
It seems to have lost something in the translation, also I have led a very sheltered life which may be contributing to the problem.
Confused of Boxford.
 
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Alan J

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mr.hutch said:
Please enlighten me re. 'Glass bottle, bottle glass.'
It seems to have lost something in the translation, also I have led a very sheltered life which may be contributing to the problem.
Confused of Boxford.
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Never explain a joke to anyone south of Watford! :p :p
 
nkt267

nkt267

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John, it was one of his odd magic tricks using hollow tubes and a bottle and glass,you need to have seen it to appreciate it..John
 
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mr.hutch

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Alan J said:
Never explain a joke to anyone south of Watford! :p :p
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Watford is 51"39'09."08N
Boxford is 52"01'40."50N

according to the google people,

so there you have it. B is north of W.
I rest my case!

Peace and love at this time,
mr.hutch
(had some interesting rides in the snow on the outfit today) :)
 
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Alan J

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I really meant to say "south of the Wandle"-but that is a bit obscure!! [the river Wandle flows from Croydon to Battersea and into the Thames].@ weeks without a bike ride, I should get my "outfit" out!
 
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