So I said to my wife......

[Howard]

Something about this thread reminded me. I stopped traffic lights this morning and a man came over and said "Is there a B&Q in Stoke?" I said "No mate, it's just S..T..O..K..E"

H

ps. I like naff jokes, but the people I pass them on to, may come looking for you with the others!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Pete Appleton]

Accuracy

I was riding my Comet the other day, when a policeman pulled alongside a speeding car on the motorway.

Speeding car? Comet? Are you sure? Perhaps it was going the other way. We have established that the jokes don't have to be funny but you could make it plausible!!

 

[Hugo Myatt]

Plausible?

Riding along a country road I began to overtake a Morris Minor. As I passed the woman driver shouted out 'PIG!'. Not to be outdone I shouted back 'Cow!', hit the pig and fell off.

 

[Comet]

Two goldfish in a tank and one says to the other "so, how do you drive this thing?"

 

[mr.hutch]

A pleasant return to normality perhaps, here.

So how about , 'god bless atheism',

or blessed are the meek, if it's Ok by you.


nothing really serious just a relief to be rid of the agro of the last few days.

Go carefully mr.hutch

vincent rides 110, bmw 17

 

[timetraveller]

Normality? I don't think any one has ever accused me of being normal!! Back to silly jokes

1) Two coffins in an undertaker's yard. One says to the other, 'Was that you coughing?'

2) Two cans of paint. One says to the other 'Darling, I believe I'm pigment.'

3) And one for the chemists among you.
Q. What is the difference between water and alcohol
A. It is illegal to make one in public and the other in private!!
Boom Boom

 

[John Appleton]

I knew you would not be able to resist it Norman--now all that is missing is Paul Ennis. Come on Paul, we are all waiting.
John

 

[Comet]

What is the best way 2 get 2 whales in a mini?










.





.

staright up the M4

 

[John Appleton]

Dear Mrs. Comet, I am writing to inform you about little Johnnies recent behaviour. We are noticing him becoming a disruptive influence among his classmates, with daily outbursts of inane humour. These outbursts are distracting the classmates from more important subjects such as political chicanery, backstabbing, the making of slanderous statements and the issuing of libelous articles.
Could you please give some attention to his diet to ensure his intake of additives with an "E" number is not too high, and keep him away from any foods containing yellow colouring. These can all cause hyper activity.
For our part we will try to ensure that he does not indulge in sniffing or smoking exotic substances behind the bike sheds, and hopefully between us we can bring this unfortunate interlude to an end.
Yours sincerely J.W.A. PP Mr G. SMITH (head master)

 

[Comet]

two tourists were driving through Wales at Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantysiliogogoch they stopped at a restaraunt for lunch and asked the waitress "before we order, could you settle an arguement for us, and pronounce where we are..... very slowly?" the waitress replied "sure, Burrr gurrr king!"